I remembered him after such a long time. I can feel the slow tearing of the sides of my heart again. Our teenage, our love, our lives, our silly dreams, our madness, our hate, our friendship..our truth. What have we done to each other?
I will never forget the day I said goodbye to him. I never thought I would be capable of stopping the pain of him in my life. When he was holding my hand and crying in the international airport, I knew that I was going to grit my teeth through this one and finish it. I remember watching him cry so hard that everyone was looking at us, I remember how I couldn't care what other people thought of this boy weeping like I was dying, I remember squeezing his shoulder and telling him that everything'll eventually be okay, I remember wondering why I was not crying. But I don't normally cry when I say goodbye to anyone. Instead, I hugged him tight and kissed him for the last time in our lives. I remember how I hesitated before going beyond the gates and came back to give him another hug. I remember how the edges of my eyes got slightly wet. I remember turning around at security check to see him watching me with those teary eyes. I remember boarding my flight and sighing with relief - it really is..finally..over.
We lived the first most large and very real parts of our lives together. It was one big friendship, love, lie and game. It was so many wrong things that it almost became right.
(1st May 2006)
I will never forget the day I said goodbye to him. I never thought I would be capable of stopping the pain of him in my life. When he was holding my hand and crying in the international airport, I knew that I was going to grit my teeth through this one and finish it. I remember watching him cry so hard that everyone was looking at us, I remember how I couldn't care what other people thought of this boy weeping like I was dying, I remember squeezing his shoulder and telling him that everything'll eventually be okay, I remember wondering why I was not crying. But I don't normally cry when I say goodbye to anyone. Instead, I hugged him tight and kissed him for the last time in our lives. I remember how I hesitated before going beyond the gates and came back to give him another hug. I remember how the edges of my eyes got slightly wet. I remember turning around at security check to see him watching me with those teary eyes. I remember boarding my flight and sighing with relief - it really is..finally..over.
We lived the first most large and very real parts of our lives together. It was one big friendship, love, lie and game. It was so many wrong things that it almost became right.
(1st May 2006)
